Top Ten List:
Reform School

From the Home Office in Busang, here's tonight's Top Ten List.

Top Ten Economic Reforms IMF wants to see for Indonesia.

The whole region is tense. Indonesia is on the brink. IMF, the International Meddlers Federation, wants Indonesia to stick to the reforms agreed upon as part of the economic rescue package. What's in the deal, here's the list.

Heeeeeeere we go,

10. Demote all those generals to brigadier-generals and save a bundle on their salaries.

9. Open up gold mining scam industry to more efficient foreign management.

8. Merge all those small subsistence farmers engaged in slash and burn agriculture into big conglomerates which can devastate the forests and jungles more efficiently.

7. Peg Rupiah to PSI index.

6. Invest in cloning technology and ensure that Suharto will always be the president of Indonesia.

5. As part of austerity measures, recycle vice-presidents instead of getting a new one every election.

4. Next time Bill Clinton calls, don't accept the collect call.

3. Redundant fishermen to be retrained as search and recover personnel

2. Institute tax concessions that would make Indonesia the 1-900-phonesex capital of the world.

And (drum roll)... the number one economic reform IMF wants Indonesia to implement...

1. Sell Certificates of Entitlement to burn forests.

[Cue music "Out of the frying pan and into the fire" by Meatloaf]

THE END

Contributed and Written by Gabriel "Loco Lobo" Goh