A Minnesota Winter
August 12: Moved to our new home in Minnesota. Beautiful here. The northern woods are so majestic. Can hardly wait for snow. I love it here.
October 14: Minnesota is the most beautiful place on earth. The leaves have turned colors-shades of red and orange. Went for a ride through the country and saw some deer. They are so graceful... certainly they are the most beautiful animals on earth. I really love it here.
November 11: Deer season will start soon. I can't imagine anyone wanting to kill such a gorgeous creature. Hope it will snow soon. What a beautiful place.
December 12: Snowed last night. Woke up to find everything blanketed with white. It looks like a postcard! We went outside and cleared the snow off the steps and shoveled the driveway. We had a snow ball fight (I won), and when the snow plow came by we got to shovel the driveway again. What a beautiful place. I love Minnesota.
December 14: More snow last night. I love it. The snow plow did his trick to the driveway again. It's so great here.
December 19: More snow last night. Couldn't get out of the driveway to get to work. I am exhausted from shoveling. F**king snow plow.
December 22: More of that white shit fell last night. I have blisters on my hands from shoveling. I think the snow plow hides around curves and waits until I'm done shoveling the driveway. Asshole.
December 25: Merry F**king Christmas! More f**king snow. If I ever get my hands on the son-of-a-bitch who drives that snow plow, I swear I'll kill the bastard. Don't know why they don't use more salt on the roads to melt the f**king ice.
December 27: More white shit fell last night. Been inside for three days--except for shoveling the driveway after that snow plow goes through. Can't go anywhere--the car's stuck in a mountain of white shit. The weatherman says to expect 19 inches of the shit again tonight. Do you know how many shovels of snow 19 inches is?
December 28: The f**king weatherman was wrong. We got 34 inches of that white shit this time. At this rate, it won't melt before next summer. The snow plow got stuck up the road and that bastard came to the door and asked to borrow my shovel. After I told him I had broken six shovels already shoveling all the shit he pushed into the driveway, I broke my last shovel over his f**king head.
January 4: Finally got out of the house today. Went to the store to get food and on the way back a damned deer ran in front of my car and I hit it. Did $3000 damage to the car. Those f**king beasts should be killed. Wish the hunters would have killed them all last November.
May 3: Took the car to the garage in town. Would you believe the thing is rusting out from all that f**king salt they put all over the road?
May 10: Moved to Georgia. I can't imagine why anyone in their
right mind would ever live in that god-forsaken state of Minnesota!!!
THE END
Contributed by Mike
