Top Ten List:
Joe Augustin Nude!

(or You Don't Send Me Flowers Anymore)

From the Home Office in Caldecott Centre, here's the Top Ten List for tonight.

Top Ten Ways Joe Augustin's life has changed since he posed nude.

Recently Joe Augustin, one-half of the dynamic duo of radio, bared himself for a publicity shot. Great courage or bad taste? How has his life changed since? We did an in-depth interview with the girlfriend of the barber of the brother of the former teacher of the wife of the third cousin of the mother of Joe Augustin on how life for Joe has changed since he bared himself. This is what we found out.

Heeeeeere we go,

10. Mothers with young daughters now call him "Joe Disgusting".

9. Has become main suspect for those panty thefts at NTU hostel.

8. On morning radio show, DJs are now known as The Flying Dutchman and that naked guy.

7. RGS girls warned not to be seen with him while in uniform.

6. Florist makes snide remarks whenever he buys flowers.

5. Has standing invitation to join "The Full Monty".

4. Total strangers walk up to him in the streets and ask, "why so shy about your feet?"

3. Women won't accept flowers from him any more - something about not knowing where it's been.

2. Has been identified by several women as their stalker.

And (drum roll)... the number one way Joe Augustin's life has changed since he went The Full Monty,

1. Women keep asking, "Is that a bouquet in your pants or are you just happy to see me?"

[Cue music, "I would do anything for love (but I won't do that)"]

THE END

Contributed and Written by Gabriel "Loco Lobo" Goh