Top Ten List:
The Bond Franchise

From the Home Office in Pinewood Studios, here's the Top Ten List.

If you've got what it takes, break free. Bondage is just too kinky. Make love, not bonds. Top ten reasons to break that bond.

Heeeeeere we go,

10 . Found out that NCB and the entire civil service uses Windows, and he's a Mac user.

9 . Decided that he wanted to pursue his dream as a transvestite kick-boxer.

8 . Suddenly realised -- he'll be one of those hated civil servants.

7 . Couldn't get posting to BFC and watch all those uncensored films.

6 . Heard that top civil servants will get pay cut.

5 . Currently making good money in the evenings going "The Full Monty".

4 . After three years overseas, realised that he can no longer understand Singlish.

3 . Found hot Ang Mo babe that digs Asian men.

2 . Wanted a few years off to go find himself.

And (drum roll)... the number one reason those scholars are breaking their bonds...

1. Wanted to test out Singtel's Global Roaming on his new handphone.

[Cue music, "Born free"]